I am really uncomfortable writing this. I am uncomfortable doing most things.

I am uncomfortable being a human because to be a human is to experience things I don’t have any control over and I don’t want to experience things I don’t have control over.

Frankly it sucks. And then I get very binary about it. It’s like “I want to control everything” or “I will control nothing.” Have it all together perfectly or just give up completely and feel sorry for myself.

Pretty lame, am I right?

There is a little girl in a photo on my altar. She is me at about 8, around the time the BIG…

--

--

writer, collage artist, poet, trickster, friend, lover, mother, general pain in the ass. https://linktr.ee/cupandsaucerheart

Love podcasts or audiobooks? Learn on the go with our new app.

Recommended from Medium

THOU TORTUREST ME TUBAL

A Response Letter

Pipe Dreams, NJ merges with the Great Pipe Dream, NZ by Judith Wray

BANK TRANSFORMED INTO A CHURCH BY GOSPEL SINGING AND AN IRISH WOMAN-Part 1

The Games We Played: A Family’s Christmas (with 2 games for you to play!)

The Great Plan

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store
Vicki Macchiavello

Vicki Macchiavello

writer, collage artist, poet, trickster, friend, lover, mother, general pain in the ass. https://linktr.ee/cupandsaucerheart

More from Medium

Talk to the Hand: PTSD and the Silencing of Victims of Abuse

Parenting Adult Children: Adult Son Rescue Mission

I Experienced A Cure From Being Online Too Much